22.

I sat around
Waiting alone
For what seemed like
Forever and a day.
The longing never went away
From when you came to stay
You always agreed to see me
But after so long that ceased to be.

You grew bored
Or was it abhorred?
At my lack of communication
And distinct lack of synchronisation.
You felt I didn't care
And you ran off
With it all in the air.
Oh girl, I love you.

It's took a full month
Or as close to so
For you to realise
What you should have known
Months ago.
I caved into my ego.
Told you the truth
And yet I still feel the one abused.

February the 11th won't be soon enough
As I still think about us
And the way this should never have been.
I was obscene.
The holiday in York
The lack of proverbial pork
Just made you think that I wasn't to care
In truth, I was simply scared.

The months rolled on
And we became distant
Like lovers bound
Yet dismissed in an instant.
It's took so long to get this far
And yet we put up with all this yarn.
I was in a foul mood
Through that time, what did I ever prove?

That to me you meant a lot,
My mind went to pot.
My nerves were shot to fuck
And all in all I never made that quick buck.
To be forever and alone
The two of us, engaged and technically entombed.
To be alone in our own Idaho
What we had seeked; hopefully soon, we may know.

21.

Through the desert
Out to the sea
I dream of all
All there have been

Why didn't you call me
Call me your castle?
Why did you never think
I was worth the hassle?

I would have surrounded and protected
I would have loved and obeyed
The only thing I can think of
Is that Fictitious were made.

Now we speak like adults
With me in my glasses.
I wonder why
I think of men in their masses.

To pray to above
They only dream of the afterlife
To believe in compassion and love
Is all that they strive.

We could have been there
But you seen so fit to see
The web you've now weaved
I hoped more was to be.

20.

I sanction my mind
And yet still I find
The lies that I weaved are still left behind.

The Camel was a falsification
I need for celebration
I just needed to bring that in.

And yet the homeless horseman
That I wrote about three songs from now
Deserves more than my heart would allow.

The mythical history
And sheer apparent catastrophe
Within my life could still be...

Another day dream aside.
A dent in my pride.
So let's just let this slide...

19.

I dreamt to believe that everything we may need
Was all hooked up beyond a wizard's sleeve
But what I failed to recognise
Was that we would both despise
The cost of corruption within our nation
And what it would epitomise...

Ian Duncan Smith don't got no hold on it
He believe in utter shit.
Why can't the normal man just live with it
When he just needs to suckle from the proverbial teet?

Now I'm sanctioned and feel so non-respondent
Yet I still feel so respondant.
Why bother in maintaining we have wealth to live off
When us on the minimum strive to give a fuck?
The 1 per-centers have all the luck
Yet I rely on the local food bank...

18.

It seems that all is just fine
Yet I feel so sublime
And you feel just as
As... Shite as thine...
Feelings without truth to dispose.
I hope that someday we'll be forever entwined...

It's never happened before
Loves's labour was such a bore.
I never imagined it would be this way;
So please just say that you'll stay
Forever and and a day.
I love you more than words can say...

17.

And oh the fear is here
I drowned my sorrows within a hundred tears.
I just wanted that voice to make.
Since that bit longer before you wake.

I watched you sleep at night
And yet it still felt just fine.
I'd love to kiss you whilst asleep
You may have been gone in a far off dream...

Where the animals all live happily ever after
But yet the Cheshire cat may still ponder
And Dorian Gray may still wonder
In his old-aged fonder...

I dream of those times we were forever young
you kissed me once and I become your slave
How I never ever dreamt to mean...
That I myself would become my own decline to the modern wage...

16.

She was oh so pretty
I feel for the city too.
I t drew me know it
The river bank was an eclectic mix
Of oral sex and still yet so full of shit.

The days were made
Of Scrumpy Jack and Turbo Lemonade
Yet we still so forbade
What life was to make us.

And now the dreams are much sober
I'm growing so much older.
I need to remain
Calm through the storm, I need to pertain
That my love will remain.

The days were made
Of Scrumpy Jack and Turbo Lemonade
Yet we still so forbade
What life was to make us.

Those days can still remain
But I still withhold refrain
The trust is gone but the offer still withstands
That all your love is still held in my hands.

You may make love with your hands
But I still hook onto you like candy
Oh so what what do I pray?
Other than a hand shandy...

15.

And I say It's gonna give me
I chance of immortality
I want such a good time
That I know I'm gonna feel fine.
I take that hit and you know This time is gonna be mine.
A time so good it's all mine... In time It's gonna be mine.

So stave the idiosyncratic ideology
For tonight I'm gonna fuckin' be free
And tonight I'm gonna live young and die a rare breed
So now I've no idea where I wanna be.

And yet et I still stave the most
For the fear that within; I feel the host.
I wanted such a good time
And yet I feel fine, I feel fine.
The dreams of yesterday slowly diluted away.
I'm but grown by another year or day.

So stave the idiosyncratici ideology
For tonight I'm gonna fuckin' be free
And tonight I'm gonna live young and die a rare breed
So now I've no idea where I wanna be.

It is the life where I just want to be;
The life of love is where I want to breathe.
I always wanted this shit to be where we all would stand
I always wanted you to be a part of my plans:
To be the one who waved from the window to myself goodbye..
When I lit that cigarette; I was never to lie.

So yet stave your problems unto me.
For you are perfect yet I yet to breathe.
I wanna live my own life so let's just fuckin' see
Any altercation, and without lust we are yet so far beneath.

My hearts beginning
For sure
My hearts beginning
I love you more

So what the fuck is the point in trying to prevail
A love so wrong that it all felt so stale?
The easy way out was what we wanted to be
An Unsocial security.

14.

If you stand in the place that you were when you face south
Then shit will only circumstanstiate your position southward bound.
Then come to me and soon you'll see
The man that all I ever wanted and aspired to be...

13.

You laugh all of the time
But yet you still just look fine
Why do you keep looking so sublime?
When I could take my own life?

What is there so special to you
That makes me feel loved yet so abused?
Why do I still run away
When you simply must be obeyed?

You stood by me far beyond the road.
You always kissed me and I felt quite stoned.
To be a eloquent heart above the ribs
Why won't you ever grant me the fever of kids?

I wished things would be up-heaved
And all was anew.
This problem now leaves us unhinged
Yet I'm still bound to you.

Please don't leave me
And all shall be forgave
I never ever wanted
To be an emotional slave.

And yet I'm here
And I still hold you dear.
I just wish you were near.
'Coz I have the fever.

12.

Love divides and love subsides
But we all know the truth
Sex at first it all provides...
It is wasted all in youth.
But you still my number
And you still got my name.
The first night I met you...
I slept with you, all the same.
It may not have been glamorous;
Certainly most vain:
But when it all comes together
After this distance now I love you just the same.

Intimacy is all well and good
But when you start to fall into falsehood
You get to figure out just where you should
Prod and poke just where to stem the mood...
The bond we could have is still intimate
A love unexplained through the innatimate.
The calling of youth bought on by age
A love so deep it sees through this minimum wage.
It all goes so unperturbed in youth
As me move on we wonder what is the use
In trying to preserve problems maintained by "the man"
When now my dear we have but one plan.

To go out, get engaged and live our life
It may not be exciting but this is the toil and strife:
To pay our bills and get by as best as we can:
Hopefully even get by so well so as to raise our wee gal or man.
Yet truthfully it still all depends on you
I still wonder what exactly your gonna do
When it all come to this weekend
And you have to confront him of the realism of the proverbial bends.
I hope soon enough
I stop being your little bit of rough
And talk to me just like a man.
I love you, but I can only do the best that I can.

11.

Flicking my ash into the bottom of a can
You're still to recognise the man that I am.
The gaze was vacant; the muse was lost
I was more akin to a corpse than that of the ghost.
The medication held me in more a subdued state
I didn't have the heart to love you; there was too much on my plate.

But now the mist has cleared and I now see what I was:
The vacant misinterpreted madman; I was subdued and still lost.
Now we're talking as if adults; my, where have nine years gone?
In but four months of not seeing you I felt yet so alone.
We're talking now just like we should, and is all just fine
Won't you please come meet me? - We'll go out, drink some wine.

I know it's hard to take, just what I'd said and what I'd done
But you have to understand I never had nor simply wanted you under my thumb.
You were free to roam and be who you wanted to
But we were bonded by some strange and inexplicable glue.
Now we're starting to understand that it was not forsaken lust.
True to no rhyme or reason, it was love and it was "Just"...

10.

I lit that hash pipe and drifted away
To lands so foreign I could not have saved
The people of the land who live on rationed dust
Yet still breed like flies; through ill-advised lust.
I fell into that coma and a sharp intake of air
Led me to see just what should have been clear
The dragon appeared and cleansed my mind
The only way to save them was to just be kind.

They drag their water far and wide
To live a simple life and just stay alive
Yet we all fatten on too much food
Is it really adequate that we act like fools?

The drugs they fuel an open mind
Head gets empty and soon you find
That the dizziness beckons but you still feel the same
You try to imagine a life out on the plain.
It's rugged and reckless and yet hot as Hell
But your own kind get by without a need for a well
An ornamented fixture afforded by greed;
Yet they don't even have the money to plant a seed.

They drag their water far and wide
To live a simple life and just stay alive
Yet we all fatten on too much food
Is it really adequate that we act like fools?

9.

Should we not aspire so high you and I
To at very least say our adieu and bid goodbye.
For the pleasure we seek has so far gone
That the love we radiated has until now shone.

We never denied all was well.
And yet the truths we withheld we never would tell.
Well I'm I'm different person from here now on.
I love you forever and a day. This deed is done.

8.

I cast no shadow upon the World before me
The life I saw was yet another infatuated glory.
Halcyons within the pre-determined dreams
And a life ripped apart, so full at the seams.
Why didn't you believe just what I said?
I wanted to just love, honour and obey.
You ran away and proclaimed that enough was enough.
Yet still over Christmas you said that stuff was still snuff.

I imagined you have the perfect New Year
I never dreamed that you would forgive me with tears.
The torment, the torture and the emotional fears
All wiped away when I told you, my dear.

And yet we went through so much over 36 seasons
And yet you couldn't even understand my reasons
For not loving you in my distance
I just wished I could explain my treason.
I hope you now understand the peril of my mind
Although I understand that it's so hard to comprehend.
New years came and gone yet my mind is still Hell bent
On loving you and making amends.

I imagined you were fine
But all it took was reasoning and time
To make you realise I was sublime
Without you I was nothing and with you I'll just have to drag the line.

You make so much sense
You are the epitome of innocence.
I realise now that my love was dragged away
And was due to be saved for this damned day.
When all came and yet all were betrayed
Please tell me that this will stay.
I love you with all my heart
Now please tell me that this is a new start...

7.

I spoke to you tonight
Wondering quite why
We were like this at all?

I was nervous and tense
But you repented
That you were excited and I felt such a bore.

I was tired and shattered
My mind was all scattered
Away with the leaves from the British Winter
Why am I ashamed to feel so bitter?

You said you'd talk to him
Maybe at the weekend
I'd prefer it to be sooner but what can I do?

It's down to your own mind
To recollect, reflect and remind
Yourself that I truly do love you.

Over the last few years I've took and I took
I was a pain and how I mistook
My lack of emotion for the realism....
Of being entrapped in my own little prism.

I look forward to being with you and your embrace
It will bring me back to the human race
I sorry that I feel such a disgrace.

But I feel so much better now
I guess you'll never understand just how I felt
To be a part of this human race.

I now know though
That you just want to know
How I feel
And to tell you how I love you so.

6.

You were from Worcester and he from North Carolina;
At the time I felt you welcomed him with an open vagina.
Now I know that you made mistakes
Why bemoan me when I also needed consecutive takes?

It all began midway through last year
When I wondered if my paranoia should be shrouded in fear.
It deemed required when I found out
I was pissed off at your open mouth.

I don't know what went on, and I still wonder why
It took me to realise that you were a passer-by
Within your own life and devoid of feelings for me
When now you finally realise, recollect and see...

That I was just me and you were you
The love generated in the past has made this situation so confused.
I can't share the way this pans out until
You learn the true identity of life-skills.

As much as I admire and love you, you'll never fully understand
That last August you crippled me with my heart in your hands.
I missed a lot of things that I shall never forgive
Oh please Lord don't stop me, and help me put up with this shit.

5.

Oh my dear Melanie
I drifted away and lost your love
Please be with me
You doubted all I was and you were sent from above.
Oh now my dear
I've got you back please have no fear
We can let loose and be ourselves
And never to listen to no one else.

I think through my mind's eye
The times we fought and said goodbye
But they were never meant
I needed to clear my head and that was my true intent.

Now, now, Melanie...
You realised that what you did was inconsiderate
I just wanted us to be content
To plant a seed and see heaven sent.
We're getting on now
And I don't believe nor I don't know how
All this ever happened
It honestly was never what I had planned.

I think through my mind's eye
And the happiness brings a tear my
Pain-stroked face and yet I start to grimace
The love I have for you will never be fenced.

For me, my Mel,
Without you is a private Hell.
I realise the changes and what I should have done
I know I should have realised sooner but God forbid the Kingdom has now come.
I was a pain in the arse and an insignificant fool
I worried about myself, I sat around and vainly drooled.
Andy ceased to be when mom died
But I'm better now and without you I realised...

I think through my mind's eye
And I just even now wonder why
We ever had to say goodbye
When there were an abundance of good times...

4.

If I flew you away
Would you dare to stay
Or would you rather say
I love you?

If I held you near
Would you ever fear
My love, my dear
Or say I need you?

The dreams held so long
Had all but gone
From me...
But you persevered...

And through my own tears
Your parents spoke clear
They told you to be here
As they understood my decline...

I needed to unwind
But never could quite find
The way to do so for myself in so kind
As to be normal for me to decide...

If I flew you away would you dare ever say
That this is now our day
And we both made mistakes?
This can be our second take.

Our second take on life.
We never had strife
And this confused me to begin with as I sought the knife.
But your still here and I'm sure you will be my wife.

In due time all shall be seen between us
I can't guarantee everything to you but baby please don't cuss.
Without you my life was thrown under a bus.
This may seem a stalker's prose, but we know better now and must grow up.

3.

I never wanted things that were to be
This seeming never-ending misery.
For four long months it seemed like it all was over
I gave up and in my mind I keeled over.
But I manned up and finally started to see
That without you my life was gone and empty.
Women came and gone, but I kept beating that drum.
Like the heart in my chest - I loved you and not the rest.

So I fell on my knees and begged you oh please
Come back to me...
It took timing and reason; but never meant to treason
His faith in you...


You admitted your mistakes in time
And now it all feels generally fine.
Four 2 months you were happy and sedate
But I had to reason that this fling was fate.
You argued and declined
I felt you wanted to say goodbye.
But over the last few days you've seen sense.
You were a reckless and foolish mess.

So all that time we lost has now gone to dust
We're getting it right.
I was so wrong to try to bite my tongue.
I loved you.

And that was me - bound tight in sympathy
I felt sorry for you and the way you were so pithy.
This wasn't the you I knew
I felt there was simply something more askew.
So I was wrong and you technically were right
I was never to give you up without a fight.
It just took so much mentally out of me...
You were the bound-tight lock, and I was simply the key...

2.

It's all been resolved
Your beginning to fix my soul
I was just out of my mind
You were simply just following blind.

You broke away from me
And my tears were real.
I could not help the way I felt in this lonely pain
Being without contact drove me insane.

I popped my pills and tried to get on
By this point I felt you were too far gone
But you accepted me and understood the fear
That I loved you and still held you so dear.

No the pain has gone in all but effect
To you, my love; I am but subject
To partial reasoning and love yet remorse.
We keep reminding one another, It can get better; of course.

1.

I am the local Camel
Spouting inane psycho-babble
Have a spade and I will travel
The long and winding road of things that unravel.
The haiku tree poses me three
Questions pertaining to my individuality
Why thee? Who do you see?
And why the bloody nora at aged 4 did you run into that tree?

The Ostrich sings
Of all the precious things
Like bells that ding
And dong
Like Cheech and Chong
Stoners with a bong!
It all sounds so damned wrong
they never washed and the ruddy pong!

Beware all of you for I am the Raptor
Reading a few books of limited chapter
Like Scientology, I'm just waiting for the rapture
But you daren't even dream of a life-time disaster.
For I will always bang the drum
The drum in question is the elephant's bum
I met him down with that car Brum
And I drove it down when the Kingdom come.

The Elephant ponders to no avail
The wonders of existence and he turned pale.
Why is my toast so feeble and stale?
Why does the margarine contain no nails?
He looked up and flounced his cry
And screaming "Oh my; Oh Lord - Oh why?!"
Deep into the midnight sky
The Elephant trampled them all and they could never ask why.